I called the doctor's office this afternoon...totally not expecting them to have results, but I needed to settle my mind. When I asked if Weslie's MRI results were in, I was quickly transferred to the doctor's personal office line.
He proceeded to tell me that Weslie did indeed have a stroke....some time inutero or during the birthing process. That she now has a scar on her brain and that is the reason for the hand that doesnt work. Pretty much after that, I have no idea what he said. It all sounded like the Charlie Brown comic "wha wha wha wha."
I quickly called Caton to try and give him the news...only to lose it and cry on the phone to him. Then decided that I needed to leave work and go and be with him. While I was packing up and leaving and getting to his office, he called the doctor's nurse and had a long conversation with her.
So here we are now...waiting until tomorrow morning...when we will go in and actually see the MRI. We will also get all of our questions answered...we have tons!!!! AND they are going to take the first of two blood draws from Weslie to start running test to figure out why this happened and how to prevent it from happening again.
I know that I should be thankful that Weslie is not more worse off than she is...and I am. But I just cant help but wonder what went wrong. I mean, I fell down some stairs towards the end of my pregnancy...could that be it...or was it something I did, or ate, or didnt do??? Just cant help but feel guilty...that somehow this is my fault...I mean, she was incubating in ME....that was where she had this stroke....it is going to be hard to let myself off the hook.
Then there is the whole issue of what lasting effects this will have (if any) on Weslie. We have read that anything from no lasting effects to cerebral palsy could be in Weslie's future. I cant imagine that she would have CP...I hope not...I pray that she is okay...that she is completely healthy.
I turn to yall again and ask that you pray too...that we will get all the answers we need tomorrow and that there are not any lasting effects that cannot be cured with physical therapy.
I will post with the news that we find out tomorrow...until then...pray with us...
10 comments:
We will keep you all in our prayers. Weslie is in good hands, God's hands. He will be with her and you all through this whole thing. I truly believe everything happens for a reason. We may not know or understand but we have to put our faith in God. In times like this I just tell myself, If God brings us to it, He will bring us through it. Please let Casey or I know if there is anything we can do to help you all out during this time. We will be more than happy to help. We will keep you all in our prayers. Keep us posted.
Love you all!!
We will continue praying for all of you. I hope you guys are able to get a few moments of sleep tonight as I'm sure your minds are going a mile a minute. The "whys" and what if's" will drive us crazy if we let them. Hang in there, God is good, and never gives us more than we can handle.
DO NOT blame yourself! You obviously are a wonderful mother who would give her life for her children! Continuing to pray for your sweet little girl...and you!
Please don't blame yourself! You've done everything that you can and because of you bringing this to the doctor's attentions - you'll have answers and will have the attention that this issue deserves. <--I hope that made sense.
I'll continue praying for you and your family - I'm positive that everything will turn out alright!
Like everyone said God will help you through this. Its easy to tell you that you can't take the blame, but as a mother its hard to not do that. But remember that you love her with all your heart and you would do anything for her, thats what matters now. You were lucky to bring this to the drs attention and now can take the steps to help Weslie. We'll be praying for you.
We will be praying for Weslie and for you. I have faith that all will be okay.
Love you guys!
Dear Adriene - This is the first time I have checked your blog in a while. We are totally shocked by this news but have a positive feeling that all will be well with Precious Weslie. As young as she is, if the damage is minimal, the brain can rewire itself with physical therapy. Don't blame yourself because you and Keith are wonderful, caring parents and it is so heartwarming to see the interaction you have with not only your children but with other children around you. We are praying for you all. Let us know if we can do anything else. Love to you all. Jackie and Max
I know that had to knock the wind out of you - but please dont feel like its something you did. It could have been ANYTHING - & look at those pictures in the post below - she is doing OK - she may just have a few things to get through - maybe not even big struggles.... I know you want answers though. Praying for your whole family & praying for the doctors who help you all in this!!!
Adriene---Weslie is definitely in our prayers. I know what a scary time this must be...we dealt with some seizure type episodes with Kennedy at one point and it was the most terrifying time of my entire life just dealing with the whole issue of "uncertainty". We'll be thinking of you and praying that she will be AOK.
Hi There! I just found your blog by following it from a friends blog. Please don't blame yourself. This just happened to our cousin and it was lack of oxygen during delivery (but he is now diagnosed with Cerebral Palsy..same thing he was not using his right hand).
There are tons of things you can do to help the damage that has been done. One is to have treatments in a hyperbaric chamber in order to deliver oxygen to the cells to repair the damage (from the lack of oxygen). Another is if you stored her cord blood, Duke University injects the stem cells into the cells that were oxygen deprived and some cells are regenerated causing unbeliveable results. Don't give up!
Sincerely,
Dawn Heimburger
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